Do you know anyone who just.. sucks? Once you suck, there is no going back. You suck forever and everyone who knows you or about you knows that you suck. Sucking is like being a race, or a religion. It sticks with you for your entire life and there is no way to get rid of it. There are just too many people (mainly Freshmen) who start off on the wrong foot and start to suck. Here are some ways to grab a squeaky clean reputation and keep it that way:
1) Don’t get too drunk. A sure fire way to start sucking is to be “that girl” at every single party. Puking is so disgusting and even if you haven’t eaten for a couple of days in order to fit in to that formal dress, don’t be “that girl.” Know your limits and know when to stop.source
2) Don’t smoke/do drugs. If you are a senior I may give you some leeway on this one because when you are older you realize that nobody really cares what you do and even if they did they would never say anything because you are a senior and they are not. If you are a freshman, stay away from the hard drugs and the cigarettes. Nothing says, “I’m trying really really hard” like smoking. Also, a sure fire way to attract negative attention, start asking people for drugs. Drugs are bad, mmkkay?
3) Don’t sleep with that senior boy! If you are thinking to yourself, “he is so nice to me… we are so in love.” No you are not in love. The only reason why that senior hottie is giving you attention is so he can get you up to his bunked queen mattress to do the no pants dance. You think that after you give it up he is going to call you again? The answer is no. The only thing you are going to get is really jealous when you see him scamming on your sorority sister two days later.
4) Don’t dive too deeply into one frat. In other words, you are allowed to hook up guys, just make sure they are not all in the same frat. Make sure to spread yourself across the fraternities, do not spread yourself within just one. Not that I’m advocating “spreading,” I’m just saying, try to meet guys in all of the fraternities, not just a bunch of guys in one particular chapter.
5) Being the girl on the phone. I know that things are uncomfortable at first because you go to a parties and don’t know people. Get off of the freakin’ phone. Nothing else screams, “wow that girl sucks” more than being on the phone the entire time texting your boyfriend who is living it up across the country.source
6) Boyfriend stealing. This is a sure fire way to suck big time. In fact, girls in sororities become soooooooo posessive over their men, past, present, and future, that it’s hard to avoid this one. It’s hard to know which guys are attached to which girls when you are first starting out. This is why I would recommend hooking up with fellow freshmen until you know which situations you can mess with and which one’s you can not. Sometimes this one takes some trial and error.
7) Stand up to the big girls. There are times when I may or may not want to punch a freshman in the face for not showing respect to the older girls. Although we may act like we love you and that you are so so special, at the end of the day we want you to look up to us as we looked up to the seniors when we were freshmen. Never think that you are better than/ can compete with a senior because us seniors simply have more access and more resources than you do. You may not think that older girl is dangerous but in Greek land, these girls can get craaazzyyyy….
Wipe that face off your head…
8 ) Not going to any events. There is nothing worse than a super cool member who just doesn’t take advantage of the greek system. Not only will you fall out of the loop but you may never get back in. As soon as you get your bid take advantage to all of the activities to the fullest extent. This will pay off in a couple of weeks when you go to parties and will know everyone there.
9) No Stage 5 Clingers. Freshmen year was particularly hard for me because I was never used to the love ’em and leave ’em game that many men will play in college. This is just apart of growing up and pretty soon you will get so used to it that you will become the one doing the loving and the leaving. Do not get the reputation as a crazy cligy girl. You are beautiful and desirable, and if one guy doesn’t see that… NEXT! It’s so easy to get men in college it’s like fishing with freakin’ dynamite. It’s not even fair.
Oh Jeremy… I always wanted my first time to be on the beach…
10) Get out of shape. I can’t tell you how many girls put on not only the freshman 15 but the freshman 30 or 40. I know you are thinking, “oh that will never happen to me.” I assure you I have have seen even the most beautiful women blow up into balloons. Watch what you eat and exercise every day. The 15 sneaks up on you with those dining hall cheeseburgers and french fries. Keep an eye on the scale…
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Duh. How have I not covered this topic yet? Here I am rambling about ways to decorate your dorm room when I haven’t even gone over rushing 101. Thank goodness I have attentive viewers like you to remind me of important topics I have yet to cover. I am talking about the most important things a Rusher is looking for in a PNM. Want to knock the socks off of a certain house? They say it’s all about “connecting” and “mututal selection”- which it is for many women. For other women, it’s a competition, a fight for the limited spaces in the top houses on campus. In a top chapter you can hand pick the PNM’s you want because when everyone wants you, you have a greater selection. This can work for a PNM too, when all of the chapters want you, you have a greater choice in where you end up.
Bid Day!!! This will be you soon!!
1) Ask questions. In any social situation if you want to make friends the formula is actually pretty simple. Act like you are super incredibly interested in someone else’s life. Ask your rusher questions and when she answers them act very engaged in her responses. Make eye contact ( not creepily) and smile (not creepily). Even if the girl is rather dull, act like she is the greatest most interesting person you have ever talked to- ever. Feel out her personality too. Does this girl seem super laid back? Perhaps you should leave your Britney Spears talk for somebody else. Feel out the rusher you are talking to. What conversation topics make her light up? What “type” of personality do you think she has? The more passionately engaged you are in a particular conversation, the more of a chance you have of being invited back.
2) Look good on Day 1. Day 1 is when a ton of the cuts are made based on looks, just because we don’t have enough time to really get to know everyone. This is the day when you should take the extra time to perhaps wear those false eyelashes (if you know how to put them on). I also appreciate a PNM who leaves the flip flops behind and wears some hot wedges or a cute dress. If you wear jeans and a t-shirt you will most likely get asked back to those jeans and t-shirt kinds of houses. If that’s what you want then more power to you, but at a top rushing chapter, we are looking for a girl with a little more pop.
A look similar to this ( a little more groomed perhaps) is great. Love the shoes and belt and scarf. Cute.
3) Body language. Smile, lean forward slighting, make eye contact, and nod frequently. Laugh at all jokes and even a tap on the rushers knee can be appropriate at times to connect. Sorority girls tend to have rather massive egos (especially at top houses) so do not make an attempt to compete with this, embrace it and nurture it. Don’t be a suck up but compliments never hurt (as long as they are sincere and thoughtful.) Instead of saying, “oh I love your shoes” try something more specific like, ” your skin is so beautiful, what make up do you use? I am looking to change mine up because i’ve been using the same blush since eighth grade…” Tie in a compliment to something about yourself. Something that you can turn into a conversation. By the way, the word beautiful always sounds very sincere, it’s silly to see how girls blush whenever I use it.
This movie is about flirting but some of the things can be applied during rush. They say that rush is all about flirting with girls… perhaps on some level that is correct. The video is kind of lame but bear with me, it also has some helpful tips.
4) Confidence. Do not feel intimidated by anyone you are talking to. I remember I was talking to the human version of barbie and I felt like a bucket of yuck in comparison. However, I managed to keep my confidence up and she ended up Pref-ing me on the last night. If you are having problems with feeling confident repeat this mantra in your head, “I am so confident, I am so confident.” Ever heard of faking it till you make it? If you think this in your head your body will project that energy, even if that’s not really how you feel.
5) Be passionate. I remember falling in love with this one PNM because she was so passionate about joining my house, she was literally glowing (not sweating, glowing). I could see the fire in her eyes that she more than anything in the world wanted to be apart of my house. If you really want to be apart of a house, pour it on! I mean, you have to act like you are the happiest most excited person in the entire world to be there. If we can see the desire and the fire in your eyes… there is no way we can deny you. Even if you feel like you can’t possibly smile anymore, give it your all at your top houses. We can see who is giving 100% and who is not.
If you are at a party this summer, whether it is for work, or school or whatever, practice striking up conversations with girls that you don’t know. This is a great way to start preparing for rush.
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Good day to you ladies, my beautiful little chicks. Ahh… things are calming down and I feel as if I am safe again from the online pythons that were ready to rip my face off. Phewf. I have started thinking about moving into my own sorority house in a couple weeks and realized that there are tons of things that I have yet to buy. Now that I think about it… you are moving into the dorms soon! Eeep! You must be as nervous as I was… back in the day. I figured we could take a break today on the rush talk and discuss another major part of freshman year: moving into the dorms.
First off, I know it’s tempting to look at all those beautiful pictures of the crazily decorated dorm rooms from bed bath and beyond. They are always bright pink with polka dots everywhere and little accents here and there.
Let me tell you one thing I know for sure, dorm rooms do not look like that in real life. In my case, I was lucky enough to have pictures on the walls, let alone a little baby chandelier over the bed. These companies are just trying to sell you a bunch of stuff you don’t need (that will only clutter up your room) so please don’t go out and buy a bunch of random decorations. Here is what I think you should have when moving in to the dorms. You should trust me because I’m not trying to sell you anything.
Bedding: Most dorm rooms require extra long twin sheets. A huge mistake I made was bringing 3,5948489 pillows with me. I know little decorative pillows are cute, but they just end up getting all dirty all over the floor.
Some of my friends brought a boyfriend pillow which apparently came in handy. I wouldn’t know because I never had one. I think they’re kind of ugly personally, but apparently they are quite functional.
Also, a nice throw blanket is great when you just want to snuggle up for a quick nap without having to get under the covers. My mom got me monogrammed sheets and pillow cases. They were really cute.
Decorations: This is where some people go overboard and end up sorely regretting it. Do not buy stupid little trinkets and what not. You have such limited space, I would not recommend filling it up with useless things.
On my wall I had my signature Audrey poster (which I still love today) and pictures of my friends and family. In many of the dorm rooms the walls are made out of a cork board material so it’s easy to post things.
Miscellaneous: For extra storage (not that you’ll really need it) it’s great to head over to Bed Bath and Beyond and pick up some stackable plastic drawers.
I would say you should buy about two or three. I bought 6 which was wayyyy too many. I still use them today and they are great for storing things like extra soap, toothpaste, towels, etc. I wouldn’t put things that you use every day in these puppies (because opening them is kind of annoying) but they are great for extra storage. Also make sure to get a plastic trash can. Do not waste your money on those stupid metal ones with the holes in them. I know this is gross but you may end up getting sick in one of those trash cans and the plastic is easy to clean and doesn’t leak. ew. gross. sorry.
I had one of these hampers and it seriously came in handy.
Don’t forget to bring a shower tote!!!!!
Things to remember: This is not going to be the palatial mansion you love and enjoy at your parents house. You are sharing this space with another person so it is important to be respectful. This means putting together your side of the room as to please not only you, but your roommate as well. You both have to live in this small space so if you think your roomie may be offended by the thirty foot tall picture of Orlando Bloom staring her in the face every morning, don’t bring it. I knew a kid who blew up a picture of his girlfriend and put the poster up on his dorm room wall. We called the girl on the poster “Miserable Molly” because her constant gaze made us all pretty miserable.
I love the Audrey Posters. They are so classy and fun. I’m thinking about getting this one. Good luck with the shopping!!! I need start getting ready too… time is running out!
love you all.
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Hello again to all of my beautiful wonderful friends. Sorry for the late post today, I have actually had real work to do for a change… sigh. For many of you I believe that rush is only a couple weeks away! WOAH! I have butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it. I have decided to dedicate today’s post to discussing common mistakes that people make when going through recruitment. These are mistakes I have seen other people make, and have made myself… so get ready to take some notes. We have to start getting serious now because time is running out.
Mistake #1: The dumb blond airhead trick.
Once again, these are girls we are dealing with here, and in a sorority we are looking for someone as intelligent as they are beautiful. When you are talking to a sister, try to moderate your usage of the word “like.” I am extremely guilty of this one and will make an attempt to work on it myself. It is difficult for some which is why you need to practice practice practice. Make a conscious effort not to say it in between every single word. I am the ultimate “like” sayer so I’ll work on this one with you.
Mistake #2: Going to the wrong house.
I remember literally almost bursting in to tears when I was waiting in line outside of Phi Pi when I was supposed to be at Phi Alpha. One of the Rho Chi’s had to literally drive me over there and I had to sprint inside the house. It was super embarrassing so please make sure you know where you are going.
Mistake #3: Using bad words.
I will admit that I swear like a sailor which is a bad habit… I know, I know. I cringe whenever I have to use little kid words like “bottom” and “heck.” However, in an effort to put your best foot forward, watch your mouth during rush. Even though you may feel absolutely at home in a certain house and even if the sister who you are talking to swears every other word, keep your language clean and appropriate.
Mistake #4: Revealing negative things about yourself.
As I stated in an earlier post, each and every sorority girl will try to be your best friend in the entire world. She will listen to you and agree with you, and basically do whatever it takes to get you to want to be in her house. If it’s a house that you really really like, don’t admit anything negative/uncool/deviant about yourself. How are the sisters supposed to know how cool and amazing you are if keep talking about how you’re not? Be confident!
Mistake #5: Dropping out of rush because you didn’t get your top houses.
I can’t tell you how many girls end up doing this and it is a big mistake. Each and every single sorority from the coolest on the row to the one that people make fun of, has an amazing time. My roommate from Freshman year ended up joining a weaker chapter at our school (it was a newer house that wasn’t as established yet) but she loves it! She has the best friends in that house and is now the Vice President! Wherever you end up you will love it- I promise promise promise.
Mistake #6: Not optimizing your facebook profile.
We don’t need to go over this one again. I know I’m starting to harp on you now…
Mistake #7: Drugs, Alcohol, Sex, Boys.
I know this one is also a review but keep anything related to these subjects out of the conversation. The sorority sisters DO NOT want to hear about how you shacked it in some guys room the night before and how you are soooooo tired. Ugh.
Mistake #8: Showing up to rush hung over.
This is so huge girls I can not even tell you. Please, Please, just do me a solid and don’t drink during rush. Please? Nothing is going to hurt you more than feeling like you are going to puke all over the chapter room. Get plenty of sleep, eat breakfast, and give yourself plenty of time to get dressed.
Mistake #9: Talking about weight/eating.
I’ve noticed that this is always a popular topic of conversation among women. “Oh my gosh I just ate a piece of pizza, holy cow, I regret it so much”… Please leave the weight conversations out of rush. We are looking for girls who are confident with who they are and how they look. Nobody cares about how much you work out or how you haven’t had a dessert since you were 9.
Mistake #10: Taking this whole thing too seriously.
Being in a sorority is just one of many facets of college life. There is so much to do and so much to see in these next four years. Don’t let not getting in to the sorority of your choice ruin your entire life. I have heard of girls who transfer because they didn’t make the cut. If you find yourself getting too worked up over something, sit back and repeat this mantra in your head: “Life is chaotic, but I am calm.”
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Tags: rush conversation, sorority conversation, sorority rush, what to say during rush
So, in between pretending to work, getting my virtual butt kicked, and breakfast, I have had little time to ponder what I am going to write about today. I’m glad that some of you enjoyed the post from yesterday. Rushing is super duper important and all, but at the end of the day aren’t we going to college to learn? Today I am feeling a little… crestfallen (if you will) about some of the smack talking going on but I will persevere and continue to post.
Since we’re on the topic of trash talking I feel that it is necessary to discuss the Mecca of all trash talking websites: Juicy Campus.com. Ugh. I hate writing out that URL because I know that as soon as I bring it up… you will bite your lip, dubiously shift your eyes from side to side (to make sure no one is watching) and type in the web address. Sigh….
When are you girls going to learn that website is BAD BAD BAD??? Most of the trash talking on that site is about the Greek system and is most likely written by sorority girls who hate other sorority girls and want their houses to look bad. The mentality is, “if we can put down this strong house enough, perhaps they will get a bad reputation and won’t rush as well in the fall. Therefore, PNM’s will stop wanting to be in their house and will want to be in ours instead.” Did I mention how competitive we sorority girls are? We all want our houses to be the best house on the row and we will stop at nothing to achieve this goal. Granted there are some houses who are chill and don’t really get involved in all the catty-ness but believe me, us sorority girls… we get crazy.
cat fight! eep!
On another note, if you want more information on the technicalities of rush (from people who are hard core pros) you should check out: http://greekfriends.freeforums.org/. This site is really friendly and takes a calmer, gentler approach to rush. It won’t scare you like some of the other sites, I promise.
Love you girls. Rush is so soon, I am so excited!!!
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Hello there my beautiful potential new members. I was rather distraught by the somewhat bad press I was getting yesterday, but I am all better now and am ready to move on. There are some die hard sorority people out there who get all worked up over one silly little blog. I’m just trying to help.. is that so bad?
Shaking it off and moving forward…
So I realize that many of you are not only rushing in the fall but you are going to COLLEGE! AHHH! I remember I could barely sleep the month before I went. No matter how many lists I made or how much stuff I bought I never quite felt prepared. Even when I was in moved in I felt as if my life was in semi-pandemonium. This is why I am writing this blog post- to give you some advice about moving in to college in general (we can take a break from all of the rush talk for a day, right?) Here are some tips that I wish I would have known before shacking up in the dorms:
Your roommate does not have to be your best friend. I know that many of you are getting your roommate assignments and are freaking out, “omg.. this girl looks so cool/weird/mean/whatever.” The thing to remember is that you don’t have to and should not expect to be best friends. I know in my own personal experience me and my roommate were two very different people. However, because we never became super BFF we lived together harmoniously with very few altercations. She did her thing, I did mine, and it worked out for the best. So don’t freak out if you and your roomie aren’t two peas in a pod right off the bat. If you do become BFF, great! If you are just different people, don’t trip. You’ll make friends all over the place, I promise.
Be careful with the whole drinking thing. I know that many of you will “experiment” (as adults call it) with alcohol for the first time, or maybe you’re a seasoned drinking pro. Either way: please be careful. I can not tell you how many freshmen I have seen puking in my chapter room, or passing out at a party. I know it’s really tempting to take that extra shot with the group so people will think you’re cool but trust me on this one, puking all over the place is not cool. As an experienced drinker ( i have some rather chubby pictures of myself from back in the day to prove it) I would recommend taking maybe one or two shots at the beginning of the night, if everyone is doing it (to be cool, or whatever). This could also be one or two mixed drinks. Then spend the rest of the night sipping on a beer. Don’t try to keep up with your guy friends because you will fail miserably (trust me). When you don’t want to take a shot just say no. People won’t think poorly of you, they’ll just move on to badgering the next person. Also, if you don’t want to drink… don’t drink. If people give you a hard time about it, they are scum bags and are not your friends. You’re on your own now and everything you do is entirely up to you.
Boys. Hmm… this is a hard one to talk about without potentially getting my blog taken off line but I’ll go for it anyways. Depending on where you go to school the guys are going to be very different. At big party schools (like mine) dating is not exactly a trip to the movies and a milk shake. My advice to you is to keep your guard up. As freshmen you are also known as “fresh meat.” These boys may seem nice, like they will love you forever, but in my experiences I have seen a lot of women (especially younger ones) get hurt. Do what you are comfortable with and do not let yourself be pressured in to anything. If even one tiny bit of you doesn’t want to do something- do not do it! If something is happening and you are not sure about it.. speak up. Say you need a break or you need to leave. Stay strong and realize that you are in control of the situation. In my experiences many men in college are dirt bags.. but there are still some good ones out there… I hope.
Go to class. Go to class. Go to class. The biggest mistake I made freshmen year was thinking to myself…” Oh i don’t need to go to class, I’ll just read the book.” Even if you are the most self motivated student in the world, I guarantee you will get better grades if you go to class. The day I decided that missing class was no longer an option for me, my GPA went up significantly. Please take my advice and go. I promise your parents will be very happy with you if you do.
The Greek system is not all there is in life. When I was a freshman I was completely immersed in the Greek system. Everything i did and everyone i hung out with was related to the Greek system. My entire life revolved around my sorority. Now that I am an old lady, I wish I would have been involved in some other type of activity. Whether it is joining a club or writing for the school newspaper, as time goes on, you’re going to need something else. Extra-curricular activities are great resume builders too.
Things are not always going to be hunky-dory, fun and games. I always felt ashamed when people would go on and on about how “aaaahhhmmmmaaazzziiinnnggg” college is, when I was feeling kind of alone. It is normal to feel a tad unhappy and out of place at first. I went to college not knowing anyone, so it was hard for me to adjust at first. Before I rushed my sorority I felt pretty lonely and sad for a little while. This is completely normal and is probably happening to everyone around you as well. People just act like they are having the best time ever, because it is what they want everyone to believe. If you are unhappy at first it is completely normal. There is nothing wrong with you, or your social skills, or your school. It is normal to feel out of place at first. Things will get better and you will find your niche in time. I am a great advice giver (if I do say so myself) so if at any point you are unhappy, feel free to email me. I will take care of you :)
source: google images
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Tags: advice on college, college life, Sororities
Hello there ladies!
I am back from my summer journey and I am back in action. I have received a number of comments concerning the accuracy of my information. While I appreciate these comments, I have to inform all of you that there are different rules and regulations regarding sorority recruitment at every school (I believe this disclaimer is posted all over the site.) There are different methods of recruitment altogether at different schools so it is up to you to do your research. My blog is based upon information from the inside of one particular sorority (mine) from a member, not an adviser, alumna, or rush coach. I am writing this blog so that women can read it and get an idea of what to expect during rush week (hence the word idea.) It is meant for fun, entertainment, and to get everyone amped on rush this fall. I write this blog as if I were giving advice to my little sister. Take it or leave it as you may. Thanks everyone.
source: google images
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